INT. DAY-JOB OFFICE – MORNING
Our WRITER is drafting a blog post about the state of his film and television watching when he looks up and --
-- Opposition Leader HON. PHIL GOFF walks through the door.
WRITER
(brightly)
Kia ora!
Phil stops and extends his hand to our Writer:
PHIL
Kia ora.
Writer stands and takes Phil’s hand in greeting but then WE GO TO SLO-MO FLASHES as --
-- Phil won’t let Writer’s hand go --
-- Writer notices that’s he’s being pulled towards Phil by the handshake --
-- Phil drops his head slightly --
-- Writer, hoping the increasing alarm on his face hasn’t shown in these microseconds, realises what’s happening and --
-- Writer drops his head slightly --
-- Phil and Writer hongi --
-- and REALTIME RESUMES as the greeting finishes.
WRITER
Welcome. But you’ve got the wrong ethnicity. I’m Samoan.
Without missing a beat:
PHIL
Ah ha – well, talofa lava.
-- and as suddenly as he arrived, Phil’s gone.
Not often one meets The Man Who. And gets to namedrop so.
Mr Goff is leader of the Labour Party.
And a hongi is a traditional Maori greeting done by pressing one’s nose to another’s.
