Ever been at the mercy – or so you think – of someone who can see the Big Picture? You think you can see the Big Picture but you can’t because you’re so close, so intimate, with the material. But you don’t realise this until after you’ve fought whatever battles with that someone – firmly but politely, of course – and you look back and you think, Damn, they were patient with me.
The jandal, as they say, is now on the other foot. From the email-boxes at dfmamea.com:
Yo -- Here is the one-page you demanded I write. And I’ve started on the outline. Satisfied?
dear acolyte
thanks for the one-pager. unfortunately, the story does not work for me.
your one-pager should answer the following questions:
– in one sentence, what is “She-Warrior” about?
– how does the film – not the story – open?
– how does the film – not the story – end?
– what film/s do you want your film to be like? this isn’t a question about your remaking a film you like; it’s about where you see your film heading – is it a Hamburger Hill or a Thin Red Line?
your protagonist’s motivation needs to be more convincing – so she wants to be a soldier: why? why does she want it so bad that she’s willing to risk abandoning her petting zoo, monosyllabic husband and illicit lesbian lover?
Yeah man -- I only wrote that one-pager stuff at, like, two in the morning. It’s only an idea.
what do you mean it’s only an idea? do you mean you have other ideas?
Like, yo, chill, dog – The story in that one-pager you were on my ass about is THE STORY.
oh. right.
now how’s that outline coming along?
I know I’m supposed to be working on that outline but I’ve had a brain-surge! --
I’ve got a theme: “You don’t mess with a bitch’s destiny”. -- What do you think?!
okay.
now how does it apply SPECIFICALLY to “She Warrior”?
Scratch that last email – I’ve just had another brain-surge!! -- Instead of her wanting to join the army, how about if she joins the stand-up comedy circuit!! -- WHAT DO YOU THINK??!!
YOU’RE GETTING OTHER IDEAS!
YOU SAID THE ONE-PAGE STORY WAS THE STORY!
now. a film about a stand-up comedienne could be much easier on the production because there’s no need to get military props, gear, location, etc. more than anything, once the story is set – no matter how familiar it might be at first glance – it becomes a matter of execution.
write what you want to put your heart into, whether it’s soldiers or comediennes or metal-workers-by-day-and-dancers-by-night.
what’s essential right now is that you pin down the story that YOU want to tell. once you commit to filming that story, you will have to see that story right to the end. that means writing it, workshopping it, answering all the questions the actors and crew are going to ask you about it, scouting for it, negotiating for it, prepping for it, paying for it, shooting it, cutting it AND THEN promoting the shit out of it. you’re gonna live that motherfucking story so it better be worth it. you better be prepared to tell it over and over and over AND BELIEVE IN IT each and every goddamned time.
now stop dicking around.
where’s that outline?
