Judged

The ever-reliable Editing Room have thrown up an abridged script for one of my 2012 faves, Dredd. Some of you may wonder how such almost literal cannon fodder can rub shoulders with the likes of Never Let Me Go and This Must Be The Place.

From Chris W‘s abridged script:

INT. HALL OF JUDGENESS

JUDGE KARL meets his plucky new sidekick OLIVIA THIRLBY.

JUDGE KARL

So you failed the Judge SAT test, but you’ve got Kuato powers so we’re giving you one more chance to prove yourself.

OLIVIA THIRLBY

(using mind powers)

I sense that you’re very... You’re kind of... You’re sort of...

JUDGE KARL

Yeah? Go on?

OLIVIA THIRLBY

(pause)

Uh, nevermind. Forget it.

JUDGE KARL

But you were about to reveal something interesting and profound about me that might give my character the slightest shred of depth.

OLIVIA THIRLBY

(looks at watch)

Wow, you haven’t shot anyone for a full two minutes.

JUDGE KARL

Damn, you’re right. Characterization can go fuck itself. Let’s go kill something.

Yeah.

I loved Dredd because it didn’t try to be anything more than it is, whether it’s a balls-out actioner, a more-faithful-than-hoped-for adaptation of the original comic character, a nicely self-contained dystopian sci-fi flick, or a combination of any/all of the above.

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Oh Well

Ye olde local started showing this one so we saddled up to support local business and see what the hype was all about.

As the end credits rolled, I turned to The Goddess and said, Well, and she loooked at me and said Well, and we hugged each other because it was nice to get out and support local business.

In an unprecedented move in our relationship, we returned forthwith to Fortress Mamea and watched the following two films in very short order:

 

It was an exhausting, essential cleansing process but well worth the time.

Postscript: Chris W at The Editing Room deconstructs the film perfectly, with my favourite abridged script line being:

CHARLIZE invites NOOMI and LOGAN to her FORESHADOWING ROOM.

.

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